By Contributing Writer, Jeannette Paulson
I recently heard a delightful story of a young woman, Christine, who fell deeply in love with a piano player, Martin, at Bible School. The only problem was that he was unaware and going out with another girl. After one year she transferred to another school, but when she heard that Martin and his girlfriend had broken up, Christine wrote and suggested that they correspond.
When he informed her that he had renewed the relationship with the other girl, Christine committed all to God. For three long years she prayed that he would be her husband. Well….Martin broke up again with his first girlfriend, and he and Christine got married.
I think Christine did several things right: she persevered in prayer. she took initiative to let Martin know of her interest, and when she found out he was unavailable, she committed the situation to God, trusting him to do what is best.
If Martin and Christine had not met nearly 50 years ago, I would think she had read Nancy Wilson’s Why Isn’t a Pretty Girl Like You MARRIED? with its wonderful encouragement and practical advice.
Here are a few of the questions Nancy answers in the book:
- What can I do to be more attractive to men?
- In what ways is it legitimate to take initiative?
- Shall I relocate to find a healthy church?
- Should I pretend to be happy?
- Is it okay to feel hesitant about dangerous frontline missions?
- What if my head (my father) isn’t guiding and protecting me?
- How can I learn contentment — even cheerfulness– as a single person?
- How do I guard my heart?
- What kind of a man should I be looking for?
- How do I love the brothers?
- How do I enforce standards of holiness?
Further, here are some choice quotes to enjoy:
….it is not only okay but positively healthy to want to be married. There is nothing in the world wrong with wanting to be married. It is only wrong to be miserable about it…. I suggest that an unmarried woman thank God that she longs to be married. Thank Him that He has given you these desires, and ask Him to keep you and protect you in them.
Unless the unmarried women are instructed carefully and encouraged regularly, they can fall prey to discontent, self-pity, or anxiety and become unfruitful members of the church.
The person in an affliction should persevere in prayer, all the while trusting that God is using the affliction for good….the woman who can pray for her future husband with a spirit of expectancy and longing, all of which is joyfully submitted to God, should never give up praying. The only time to quit asking for a husband is when you cease to want one.
Consider what you could do to be more beautiful… To deny the fact that men appreciate beautiful women is to argue with gravity.
If you find that you can’t really rejoice when a friend gets engaged, then you’ve probably got a case of envy.
Whatever career you decide to pursue, you should be willing in principle to drop it if the right man comes along. The reason I say this is because any career that you might have is inferior to the calling you will have as a wife and mother.
If you are single, and it feels like an affliction, I hope you will get this book and enjoy Nancy’s wisdom and humor as much as I do. Don’t waste your singleness. Suffer well, believing God gives good gifts — today.